Mark's recovery has been going well and he began the process of coming off the Dexamethazone. It has needed to be a slow process as his body has become used to the drug and stopping too suddenly could see him having symptoms of headaches and possibly seizures. But with the aid of sleeping tablets, he has been managing very well with only slight symptoms of tightness in the head. He did however, go through a point of feeling like the tumour was coming back and had headaches, tiredness and even a slight numbness down his left side. This we were told, is quite normal and not to panic too much as it is part of the healing process from the radiotherapy.
Sebastian however, has been more than a handful to manage and my stress levels had been rising daily and I was becoming more and more run down each day. I was thankful that Mark had been feeling better and able to help me with Sebastian as I came to a point where just getting out of bed was a massive task. I tried multi-vitamin tablets and forcing myself to do exercise but nothing worked. People told me that it was just my body catching up after all the stress of the last three months and while this may have been true, I knew I could not continue this way, so I made a trip to the local GP and asked for a blood test. The results showed that I had low iron stores and although my body had enough iron, I had very little in reserve. Of course the doctor put it down to our "Plant Based" diet and suggested I take an Iron supplement. I was convinced however, that vegetarians DO get enough iron in their diet, providing the diet is varied and contains lots of different vegetables, beans, nuts and grains, so I ignored his recommendations and "Googled" instead.
My suspicions confirmed, I began taking vitamin C tablets to help my body absorb iron better from the foods I was eating. A trip to Mark's Naturopath also helped and I was given some more tablets to take. We had also recently completed a "Hair Sample Test" which involved taking some hair from close to the scalp and sending it off to a laboratory for testing. Apparently your hair can tell a real story about what is going on in your body, including levels of minerals, heavy metals and much more. I was shocked to see Arsenic appear on Mark's results and Aluminium readings on my results as well as really high readings of Copper. Although none of the levels were of a dangerous level, it was still a surprise to know what is floating around and stuck in the tissue of our body. As if changing to a plant based diet is not enough, we now try to avoid aluminium based deodorants and non stick cookware and try to buy organic produce where possible. We have also been given a range of tablets, powders and potions from the Naturopath to eliminate any toxins and bring all levels back to a normal and healthy range for optimum health.
Less than a week later and I am finally feeling well and strong again. While I am not 100% yet, I feel alive, happy and able to get on with life. This week has been particularly good with Sebastian's behaviour finally back to what we know and love. His attitude had been so off the scale we were both at our wits end. Nothing seemed to work; punishments, timeout, removal of toys, banned from Wii games, banned from iPad games, cancelling activities and I'm even ashamed to say, smacking! Every day was a battle of wills and again, people told us this was quite normal for a three year old.
Each week the situation got worse until one Friday (Childcare Day), it really hit the fan! He refused to put on his shoes or get in the car as he was "NOT GOING"! We talked, threatened, yelled and forced him into the car. I'm sure the neighbourhood heard the commotion and eventually after 20 minutes of fighting in the carport, he was strapped in - TIGHTLY! He screamed all the way to the city and we took him in. He was transitioning into the Kindy Room and was not happy about it. Knowing that he dislikes any kind of change, we knew that we just had to push him to give it a try, just like everything else he has been scared of trying or doing. It was exhausting and after staying with him for 15 minutes, the teacher finally asked us to leave as it was disrupting the room. As we walked out the building, we could hear him screaming out, but there was nothing more we could do for him.
When we picked him up that afternoon, he was the happiest boy on the planet and I swear he grew an inch! He was so proud of himself and showed me all his work that he had done that day. He was so happy, he didn't want to leave! This is so typical for him, a whole lot of unnecessary drama.
Just when we thought his behaviour couldn't get any worse, IT DID! Sunday saw us at a BBQ out the other side of town. It was a long drive and Mark seemed up for this social event (one of the very few social activities he has done since everything happened). It was a great day and all the circle of friends attended, first time for years that everyone was together. The children all played and had a great time, but when it came time to leave, Sebastian was not keen (typical of his new style of behaviour) and we braced ourselves and carried him out, thankful that he did not make a spectacle of himself. Amazingly, he did not fall asleep on the way home until we were just around the corner and 2 minutes from home. I tried waking him but he was out. Once home he woke and went about his usual play until the evening routine. In bed, showered, teeth brushed and stories read, we relaxed thinking he will be out like a light, but to our surprise he bounced straight out of bed and refused to go back. My blood boiled and no amount of anything would get that child back to bed. All toys were taken away, as was TV for two days as well as all activities and then the clincher...HIS BLANKIE! Taken away and put on the top shelf in his room. He could see it, but not reach it or cuddle it. Eventually, an hour and a half later, he cried himself to sleep with no blankie or bed toys.
I was totalled. My nerves shot, my hands and body trembled for 3 hours and a migraine started to rear it's ugly head. Next morning, he awoke at 6am, typical of a late night. With no TV to fall back to, he was forced to play with his toys (the few that he had left). Expecting another tantrum, we were amazed when he just went off and started to play by himself while we tried to get a little more sleep. Surprisingly, we managed the whole day without any electronic entertainment and a new child started to appear. That night he was allowed his Blankie but no other toys were asked for or offered. That night was blissfully quiet and it was 7am before we heard him running down the hallway for his morning cuddles. Once in bed he said "Think I can have one of my toys back?". It was spoken in such a sweet and kind tone, the way he used to be. I hugged him some more and told him he could have two toys back, one for going to bed on time and one for staying in bed until 7am. Considering he had lost around 20 toys, I was amazed that he thought this to be a great deal. When he asked if he could watch some TV, I gently suggested he play with the toys that he chose to have back and he happily agreed.
Day three and it was a really hot day and again when asked to watch TV, I suggested he might like to watch a movie later that day. He was excited and the deal was done, after lunch, he could watch a movie. Day four and he was able to play some Wii games but no other TV. And today is day five, Kindy Day, and although there was a few minor comments like "I don't want to go", when I reminded him of what a great day he had last week and the agreement we had. He happily attended, kissed me goodbye, collecting his workbook to start doing some drawing and colouring.I am just amazed at how this beautiful butterfly has emerged. Sebastian has never been allowed to watch huge amounts of TV, only an hour in the morning and the same in the evening. The rest of the day the TV is switched off. Console games and iPad games where only offered a few times a week, which I believed to be quite reasonable. Was it the removal of Blankie or removal of the electronics, we may never know. But what we do know is he has never been happier and his creativity has never been better.
Just when I thought I couldn't be happier, I received the phone call that we have been waiting 16 weeks to receive. The Insurance has finally been approved and we will be receiving a cheque in the mail next week! This was the lump sum payment that was supposed to get us through our life when we had no other income. And tomorrow we head off for a short 5 day beach holiday in Normanville. I have my son back, I have my husband back (dex free as of today), I have my energy back and we are all getting AWAY from it all (dog included), even if it is just for a short time, we can finally RELAX and be HAPPY!