I remember those days. But when life throws you a near death experience, you tend to reassess what is important in life. For me, it was being home with my son; teaching him about the world and giving him as many learning opportunities as I can before he starts school. The first 5 years of a child's life is what shapes them as a person for the rest of their lives. This is a well-documented fact by the way, not my opinion.
For Mark, his love and passion in life is spread across family time, personal hobby / interest time and programming. He loves programming, which is excellent, because that is his / our main income stream. Confucius once said "Choose a job you love, and you will never have to work a day in your life". However, sometimes working in a busy office with lots of deadlines and stress negates the joy of writing code. So how do we resolve this problem? Easy....throw money at it and build the ultimate man-pad!
To all the men reading this post, I want you to imagine what your ultimate man-pad would look like. It would have a wall mounted flat screen TV with a PS3 and a Wii, a couch, a good sound system, nice work space with large dual flat screens, fast network/internet access, good lighting, excellent air-conditioning and just far enough away from the house to have the peace and quiet you know you deserve. Well that is what we have created and we are mighty proud of our efforts. We are now officially broke, but have never been happier.
It has taken us a good 3 months from start to finish as well as two builders onsite 4 days a week over 6 weeks to build the dream. But for my Man, nothing is too much effort. He is worth every bit of the blood, sweat, tears and black hole in the bank account. As I moved in to his old office many months ago, he had been working on a rather small desk in a large room (the old man cave that I originally made for him when he came out of hospital). As he is now fully recovered (and has been for several months now), his need for a better workspace was paramount and hence the man-pad idea was born.
It was also brought about by the need of some friends who required somewhere to live for a few months. We thought if we could create a new space for Mark, clear out the old man-pad area of our house, rent it out and recover some of the money spent on the renovation. So we worked hard to meet the deadline, only to find the friends had made other living arrangements. So we started offering it to other people who were also in need and before we knew it, we had new tenants! It all happened so fast and we were madly cleaning and clearing out the space for them so they could move in immediately.
So now we can breathe, reflect and have a beer to celebrate our achievements. And we have one more very important achievement to celebrate. Do you know what it is?
It's been one year since I kissed Mark firmly on the lips in hospital and told him that I would see him later, once the doctors had finished removing part of his brain! Yes, that's right. It's been a year since his operation! It seems such a very long time ago. According to doctors, Mark should still be in the recovery period, but we left those days behind 6 months ago. We are in the "loving life" period now. Every day is a celebration. We are alive, healthy, happy and we have each other. We do the things that make us happy and avoid the things we don't love.
Friday 18th October was the official anniversary of Mark's operation. We had already enjoyed "Date Night" the weekend before but we still wanted to celebrate the occasion with others. We had originally dreamed of a big party, inviting everyone we knew. But finances and timing was not on our side. Sadly, we decided to scrap the whole idea of a big party. I asked our new tenants if they would be home on Friday night with the thought of sharing our traditional Friday night Pizza with them. Sadly, they had other commitments and would not be home. The anniversary kept bothering me as I felt that we really needed to do something. Then, Thursday morning it hit me. I wrote down the names of all the people who helped me/us through those really tough times. The people who repeatedly brought food, looked after Sebastian, did my ironing, brought in my rubbish bin, sat in my lounge room while Sebastian slept and I visited Mark in hospital, drove Mark to appointments when I could not, comforted me when I needed it and visited Mark when he needed it. The people who will forever be my family. The people who put their own needs to one side to help us out. I wrote down five names, composed a text message and sent it out. It was Thursday morning and I had asked them to come for Pizza on Friday night! What was I thinking?
I'm sure you have tried to organise a function with a group of people in the past? I have, many times and just given up as there is always someone who can't come on this day and others who can't make it on that day. What possible chance did I have of pulling this off with so little planning and so little notice? Not much chance at all. I went about my day as normal and it wasn't until the evening that I remembered the text message I had sent and the zero responses I had received! But then, one by one, my phone started vibrating with messages and by Friday morning, I had 4 out of 5 positive responses!
That night our home was filled with happiness. There were children running and laughing in the yard and adults filled our entertaining area with conversation and laughter. Mark and I made custom designed pizzas like professionals and once all our guests had their food, we made a speech. We felt it was important to acknowledge the adults (and the children) who filled our hearts with love, joy and hope. I wanted them to know that every contribution, small or large, when put together made the most profound difference in our lives. It was the most special night and one that I will never forget.
So if you have been wondering how we are, why not give us a call? Let's get together and have a BBQ. Come and check out the pad, have a beer and play a game. The weather is amazing so let's enjoy it. Life is for living and celebrating, so come celebrate and share our happiness with us!
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