Post Number 30 - What we Need

There have been many people who have been wanting to help us through this difficult time, so I wanted to document all the things that are positive contributions to our life.  I thought this to be a better way to share our needs, rather than contacting people individually and asking, or continually relying on a small number of people who have turned their own lives upside down in order to accommodate our needs.

My hope with this post is that you can gain a better insight to what our needs are, and if you are able to contribute in some way, small or large, know that it will be greatly appreciated.  For those people who have already contributed by looking after Sebastian while we travel to Sydney, or visit Mark on a Monday while I am at College, I can't thank you enough. I know I have not personally thanked you all, but please understand that the time that you took out of your own busy lives, to spend a few hours with Mark is appreciated more than you realise.

So here is a list of things that make a positive contribution to us and a positive healing environment for Mark;

Mondays - Spend some time at our place with Mark while I am at college.  You can bring work, use our internet connection or bring any other things to do.  Spend time just hanging out with Mark, but expect that he will need to have some quiet time as well. I understand that this is a big ask and that many of you work, study or have families to look after.  But if it is at all possible for you to spend any time, even if it is a few hours, it is of great need and benefit.  Mark should not be left home alone all day and my study at Endeavour is of the greatest importance and relevance.  There will come a time when I will need to re-enter the workforce and this degree is what will provide that opportunity.  I have this Monday covered, but there are still 8 Mondays left in this semester (not including Easter), so if you can slot in to one of those days, please, please, please let me know.

 

Ride to the airport on Wed morning around 10am, on the 25th March. This will be our next trip to Sydney for Mark to receive another round of Acupuncture by the Chinese Doctor.  If you happen to be available on this morning to drop us off at the airport, it will save us a lot of money in car-parking costs.

 

Have Sebastian for a play date, either a short one after school or a longer one over the weekend.  Saturday mornings are good, or a Friday night sleep-over even better as I drop Mark at Yoga at 8.15am and then drive to Willunga Markets to purchase fresh, local and organic produce for our weekly meals, usually returning around 10.30-11am. 

 

Home grown produce - any produce that you have grown in your gardens that you have spare would be very welcome.  According to Mark's Chinese Doctor however, he is not to have pumpkin or eggplant (which is a bugga as that is what we have growing in our garden).  His super-foods however, which will help his body to heal are sweet potato and figs (fresh or dried).  So if you have either of those growing and you have spare, we would greatly appreciate any that you may have. We also use a lot of lemons in our everyday cooking. 

 

Free Range Eggs - if you have chickens and you can spare some eggs, we would love to receive them.  Also more than happy to pay for them too, providing you have happy chooks who produce happy eggs, we are happy to pay! 

 

Flowers or cuttings from your garden.  Anything from nature that can be put into a vase would be lovely.  It helps to create a nicer indoor environment and a closer connection to nature inside the house, but please, no potted plants. 

 

Nuts - all nuts are good except pine nuts, providing they are raw or dry roasted and not covered in sugar or other flavourings.   

 

Herbal Tea - Mark tends to drink a lot of green tea, but also enjoys different flavoured herbal teas.  There are some beautiful leaf teas available these days, especially at market stalls.

 

Short visits from friends or invitations for a short get-together.  The three of us are all in a very good headspace and are more than willing to spend time with people who wish to share their love and support.  You are also welcome to come and visit us, phone, email or text, but with the understanding that Mark can only handle 1-2 hours of socialising.  If you do prefer to come to our house, know that he may just leave the room and spend some quiet time to recharge.  He feels uncomfortable with lots of noise and he may need to walk away if it overwhelms him. Don’t take it personally, just understand that he is simply taking care of his needs and allowing his body what it needs. I am also open to catching up with friends, albeit for short periods.  It is important for me to look after myself and the odd coffee with a friend, a brunch or a lunch date is always good for the soul.  Again, it will have to be brief as I can't leave Mark home alone for long periods of time.

 

Things that are not helpful and we would rather not have;

 

Chocolate, sweets, cakes or sweet treats.  All cancers feed off sugar, so anything sugary is not helpful to Marks healing (or my waistline).  I know it is a very common thing to give a sick person a box of chocolates, but the evidence is very clear that sugar suppresses the immune system and creates inflammation in the body.  Watch and see if your kids get sick just after Easter when they have overindulged in chocolate!!

 

Advice/information about alternative cancer treatments i.e. Mushrooms, curcumin, medicinal cannabis etc.  UNLESS there has been specific evidence related to brain cancer.  Cancers in the body are VERY different to cancer in the brain and I am yet to find any treatments that have helped in the area of brain cancer with the exception of the treatments offered by the Chinese doctor who we are already seeing in Sydney.  He has had some success in this area and hence why we are going to such lengths to travel to see him on a regular basis.  His treatments are expensive as is the cost of travelling as well as the personal cost of leaving Sebastian behind and burdening our friends to take care of him.  But, if it gives us a chance to have Mark in our lives a little longer and if the quality of his life remains such that we can create happy memories, then we will move heaven and earth to get there.

 

Thank you again for your thoughts, prayers, cards and contributions.  I know we still have a very long road ahead, but with many hands, the challenges seem very achievable, worthwhile and rewarding for all concerned.  Life is amazing and we continue to be thankful each and every day for the gifts that life brings us.