On Thursday the 5th of February 2015, we were given the news that Mark's tumour had returned and that it was bigger and more aggressive than before. Modern medicine had little more to offer, with the exception of chemotherapy as an unlikely chance to maybe slow things down slightly. But we collected ourselves, found alternative treatments and options and moved forward.
Since then our lives have been wonderful, joyous and relatively stress free. Mark could potter in the garden, do short bursts on the computer, meditate, relax in the hammock, cook and look after himself. I could study and attend college by arranging company for Mark in my absence. I could go to the shops, take Sebastian to and from school, all in the knowledge that Mark would be ok. How did this all change so quickly?
It took just 10 weeks!
On the 10th of April (6 days before our official wedding anniversary) we attended a special event called the "Village Market Feast". Mark was looking forward to this event as it was to be a 3 course dinner, planned, prepared and cooked by Callum Hann (those of you who are Masterchef fans will know who he is). So we spruced ourselves up and prepared for a special evening, including Moet champagne on arrival. So keen were we that we arrived 15 minutes early, so we sat in the car and chatted about what culinary delicacies we may encounter over the evening. And then it happened...
Mark had a partial seizure. I held his hand tight as he let the wave flow through the left side of his body. It took only 2 minutes, but it was all the information we needed. Despite all our efforts, the tumour was growing. We took a moment to acknowledge it but then quickly moved on. We entered the venue and enjoyed the evening as if it were our last. And in a way...it was.
10 days later and I was loading the car for Kangaroo Island, a family holiday I had booked many weeks before. Realisation really kicked in when I had no choice but to organise, pack and load the car by myself as Mark had not slept well and was feeling particularly weak. Suitcases, boxes of food and activities needed to be correctly arranged to ensure they all fitted into the car. Our desire for healthy Indian food (Ayurveda), meant I needed to cook as much food as I could to take along with us. So on Monday night, after a day at College, I cooked an Indian feast and packaged the left overs, along with a sweet potato soup (laced with turmeric & ginger) and other delicious and healthy treats. My sixth sense was obviously working, because we soon learnt that healthy food on the Island was impossible to come by and any shops required significant driving to access. No such thing as the local IGA or corner Deli!
We all travelled reasonably well including the boat ride. My anxiety about driving the car onto the boat soon vanished as it wasn't as difficult as I thought it would be. Our accommodation at Emu Bay was nice, although not directly on the beachfront as I had imagined, but still, the view was beautiful.
With a better sleep and some sunshine, we seized the opportunity to do some sight-seeing and headed for Seal Bay. I faced my fears and drove on an unsealed road for the first time in 15 years. The last time I was driving a 4WD with two passengers and managed to roll the car three times, with it landing upside down. Everyone survived the crash, however, I have never been able to travel on dirt since. But I knew I needed to face this and I am proud to say that I did it with ease and I again showed myself just how capable I am.
The "Raptor Domain" Birds of Prey and Reptile Park was positioned on the turnoff road to Seal Bay and boasted a gourmet hamburger café. We entered and looked forward to a nicely brewed coffee (as I had forgotten to pack coffee...doh) only to receive a badly made pod coffee with un-frothed cows milk. Thankfully the Birds of Prey followed by the Reptile show soon overshadowed the bad coffee and we managed to get many great photos including me holding a Wedge-tailed Eagle and Mark and Sebastian holding snakes and lizards. It turned out to be a really fun morning and I would highly recommend it to any KI tourist. The gourmet burgers were not so gourmet, but with absolutely no other options for lunch, we were grateful for what we had.
With Mark still determined to experience the day, we drove on to Seal Bay. I asked a thousand questions to assess if Mark would be able to make it to the beach and he decided he would push on. As our tour group consisted of only us plus one other person, we made it with ease (even the 40 steps down onto the beach). The 45 minute tour went fast and soon we heading back up the steps and the path. We rested halfway on some seating, only to be escorted back to the top of the hill (apparently although there is seating, you are not actually allowed to stop and use it!)
The following day brought a bad night's sleep for Mark and he was in no shape to go out. Reluctantly, I left him home armed with enough supplies for lunch, a cup of tea and him sitting outside on the balcony admiring the view and the fresh air, while Sebastian and I headed into Kingscote for food supplies and lunch. The rest of the day was spent at the house as we watched the bad weather come in and remind us that winter is almost here.
While we enjoyed some lovely moments together, the picture I had in my mind of a perfect family holiday was not to be. But we did the best we could and we still managed to get to the Marron Farm (seafood platter with Marron) and Dudley Wines (gourmet pizzas) for the only culinary lunches offered on the Island. Overall, under the circumstances, Mark did famously well as did I with all the driving under sometimes trying conditions.Arriving home Sunday evening left me no time to purchase food or prepare for a week of school and college, but I managed to scrape together enough for a healthy dinner and enough for Sebastian and Mark's lunch the next day. That night I fell in to bed exhausted, but again, proud of my achievements, Sebastian blissfully unaware of his father's diminishing condition.
As I packed for college the next day, I decided I would prepare and pack everything for the day, so Mark had little to do. Once in the city, I took my time, knowing I would be late, but also making sure I had what I needed such as a healthy breakfast and good coffee. Arriving to class 10 mins late, I enjoyed my breakfast in class rather than taking notes and I was unusually quiet. After only an hour, the lecturer stopped the class and called an early break. She immediately approached me and asked if I was ok and how my husband was. I had advised her very early on of my situation and she understood as she had lost a husband to a terminal illness many years ago. Her kind words touched me and I could no longer hold back my devastation. She quickly took me outside and my two college friends soon followed. The more they hugged me the more I cried. This was all so new, I had only spoken to one person about it last night. So many thoughts rushing through my mind, my assignments, only a few weeks of study left for this semester, needing carer support, wheelchairs, ramps, showering aids....OMG, is this really happening?
My lecturer insisted I leave the class immediately and she would not allow me to stay. She had all my assignments extended and told me I was to spend the time with my husband and not at college. So I left, made a trip to Hahndorf to get some homeopathic medicines for Mark, quickly visit my Mum, food shop and be home in time to make Mark's lunch! That was yesterday and today I refocus with a new set of goals and a new set of needs. With the pressure of study off my shoulders, I can focus on what I need to do next to ensure I get the professional support I need, that Mark's needs are met and that I don't burn myself out. Onward and upward...
No comments:
Post a Comment