It's so hard to believe that the year has flown by so fast, and I find myself sitting alone yet again in reflection, after hugging my dearest cousin goodbye again, only with one big difference. Instead of sitting on my balcony at home, I am sitting in the lobby cafe in a hotel in Singapore!
Indeed Regina had come back and spent another summer holiday with us, only this time, I joined her to Singapore where we spent three wonderful days exploring this beautiful and inspiring city. From beautifully kept gardens and a real connection to nature, to the use of technology in advanced systems at every turn. This city that never sleeps, really had everything to offer us, and we made sure we packed in as many moments and memories as we could before she left for Germany in a teary goodbye in the hotel lobby.
The past year hasn't been all rainbows and unicorns however, and we had both been through our own personal struggles. Not long after Regina left us last year, a diagnosis of breast cancer rocked us all. How on earth could this be possible? Neither of us cold believe it. For me, I was overwhelmed with feelings of "how did I miss that" and for her, feelings of disbelief and mortality as she became part of the cancer treatment rollercoaster.
Feelings of helplessness due to the sheer distance between us and the lack of control with western medicine were common feelings we shared. But she did the hard work of having surgery, along with daily radiation treatments and endless appointments relating to the diagnosis. While she had a network of friends supporting her, she still spent most of her time alone as she worked through the mental anguish until she could find a place of acceptance and peace.
My year had also been somewhat turbulent. While the business continued to do well, the rent of the clinic room was still a big financial drain and I decided it was no longer viable. I kept good relations with the staff and managers of the medical centre and wellness centre however, leaving me in a position to use a room on the odd occasion if I was "really desperate". Mostly, I did home visits and phone consultations and I watched my profits double, as I no longer needed to pay rent. Finally I was making some financial traction in this business and my confidence in making this career choice grew.
I also worked on my practitioner course delivery and promotion and before I knew it, my courses became more and more popular as word spread about my teaching offerings. This was very exciting, as it was easy work for me, with the majority of the course pre-recorded, I simply had to "show up" every fortnight to introduce the training module and deliver a Q&A at the end. With incredibly positive feedback from the course participants, I totally thrived in this stress-free online course delivery environment.
Early in the school year, a good friend of Sebastian's was missing him dearly since he had changed schools and I received a phone call from his mother. A few conversations later and a brief meeting at home, and it was agreed that her son would also change schools and become a border in our home. This was an exciting new development for our household and the arrangement would also bring some much needed financial benefits. This lovely young teen moved in at the start of term 2 and we soon found a good rhythm that worked for us all. Little Leo was also excited to have another human to harass, steal things from and cuddle up to in the evenings on the couch.
Things were really looking great until the day the boys came home from school really upset, angry and quite fed-up. Leo did his very best to entertain the boys and change their sadness to joy, but even his antics could not change the mood in the air. I started some conversation and within an instant they both explained their disgust, anger and frustration around their science teacher at school. They explained her humiliation tactics, bullying of students and her sheer lack of teaching ability and lazy and somewhat unintelligent lesson delivery. I had never seen both the boys so upset and their list of valid complaints so long. I promised the boys that I would not accept this and would contact the school the very next day. Unfortunately, this decision caused a chain of events and misunderstandings that would cause one stress after another for the rest of the year.
I contacted the school as promised and reiterated the complaints that I had heard from the boys the evening before. I explained that I was disgusted with the teachers' behaviour and I was making an official complaint against her as she was threatening to fail Sebastian for this subject. I felt my feelings had been understood and validated, and I thought nothing more of it. From then on however, the boys were targeted with sneer remarks and average marks on their science assignments. Not only had I made their science class worse, I also now had Sebastian's friend's mother on the phone, advising me that it was not my place to ring the school on behalf of her son. I explained that I had not done this, but merely made a complaint against the teacher and defended my son and not hers. But she never accepted my explanation and as the year went on, situations became twisted and changed to make me appear as the villain who was trying to take her son away from her, which of course, was never on my agenda.
No matter what I said or did, I was too soft, too interfering, too engaged in her son's interests, and not engaged or strict enough to stop his online gaming habit. I was also the blame for anything that came out of his mouth, as she had never heard him say this or that and it therefore must have come from me. The accusations were never ending and by the end of the year, it was clear that the arrangement was no longer salvageable, as this had been "the most stressful and upsetting year for her."
This ordeal upset me to my core, as this young teen had joined our household without many life skills, and he left us and the school with a new level of maturity, experiences and knowledge. For the first time in six years, he had unpacked his backpack of all his personal knick-knacks, as he felt a sense of stability and belonging. We taught him some cooking basics, cleaning basics and gave him a place in our home that he could call his own. He spent around 18 days a month with us and the rest with his family, who yoyo'ed between Kangaroo Island and the mainland. He loved coming with us to Robotics Club three weekends out of four, and developed several projects that remain to this day, unfinished, as he no longer "has time" or the opportunity to attend.
His time with us was equally beneficial for Sebastian as his first year at the new school was filled with making new friends and gaining much respect from his peers. Past years at high school, and indeed this first term, had seen him spend most of his break times sitting alone, and while he was well liked, his shyness meant that friendships did not come easily. Sebastian really grew out of his shyness due to this friendship and arrangement, and this will be something we will always be grateful for.
Little Leo continued bringing us much joy and unconditional love as he waits faithfully at the front door for anyone to come home to him. Thankfully, my new work arrangements mean I am home a lot of the time so he doesn't need to feel lonely for long. Except for right now, when I am thousands of miles away, in another country, waiting for the time to pass so that I can make my way back home.
The decision to leave was not an easy one by any means. With Sebastian now nearly 16 and his maturity at a young adult level, I grappled with my motherly instincts and emotions as to whether he was ready to look after himself and the household for a week on his own. He assured me that he could manage just fine, and I cooked and fussed until I was satisfied that he wouldn't go hungry and he had all the resources he needed for success. Talking to him from afar, it was clear to me that he was enjoying the challenge and the opportunity to show me his capabilities.
The first night away and a large tree branch dropped onto the roof, making such a din that all the neighbours wondered what had happened. We discussed it the next day and he sought out some support from a neighbour while he climbed onto the roof, removed the offending limb and assessed any damage. I really couldn't be prouder of the young man he has become and I can't wait to hug his tall thin frame and tell him how much I love him, because without him, life just isn't enough.
What this year will bring is a mystery to us all, as always, and I now never want to take anything for granted, including our health, our security and our freedoms, as we move forward in a world led by egotistical men, who care for nothing else but their financial power and political status. A world where greed, money and possessions win, over the needs of the people and the health of the planet. What will happen next, we can only hope the end result is peace, no matter how we need to get there. Spending this last week in a densely populated city, full of different cultures and religions, and seeing it harmoniously working, giving hope that humanity has the ability to create a peaceful world, when the right influencers and industry leaders are allowed to create it. May we find our stability and our peace, and be allowed to continue our work in meaningful ways is my prayer for today and indeed for this year and beyond, so our children can go on living without fear of what the future may bring for them.